Q: Do I have to bring a hostess gift to a casual dinner if I’m told not to bring anything?
A: You don’t have to bring a hostess gift, but you should, and it is certainly a nice thing to do. It can be even the smallest bouquet from your own yard. It shows appreciation for efforts. And, always send a thank you of some sort (be it email, handwritten note, text or phone call). It matters.
Q: What do I do if I brought a bottle of wine to an event where the hosts do not drink?
A: Apologize. They will understand if you didn’t know (it won’t be the first time). And, ask if they would like to keep the bottle (some hosts will offer wine to guests even if they do not imbibe) or if they prefer you to keep it. Perhaps follow up with a note.
Q: When can I use paper napkins and when do I need cloth?
A: Paper can be used when it is just the immediate family at home (or serving a gaggle of kids of any age). Use cloth for guests of any kind (even your adult children coming over for a nice dinner) – it shows them that you think highly of them (and let’s face it, we all like to know that). Side note: niceties such as the above set the tone for an evening and for behavior.
Q: When can I check my cell phone when out to dinner?
A: Is it a date, well then, never at the table (obviously). Excuse yourself and check in the restroom. Are you concerned about something that may need your attention (children, emergency)? Inform your companion and ask if they mind if you check. If you are out with a group of friends, chances are they are all on their own phones so will not notice.