So I’m at a playground with my five-year old niece trying to keep up while chasing her from swings to monkey bars to jungle gym back to swings, you get the picture. This is a playground specifically designed for small children by the way, but also part of a community center and school field area. We are having a great time (well she is and I’m feeling old and dizzy) when schools let out and some of the older kids come to hangout on the swings before moving on to whatever activity comes next. I don’t mind this because, well, it’s a public playground behind a school and they are just kids relaxing, right? What I witnessed next was such a disturbing display of disrespectful behavior that it has stayed with me for weeks.
The disrespectful behavior from these young people I’m referring to is an utter disregard for others around them, for their general surroundings, and most worrisome, for themselves. As my niece is on her umpteenth time down the slide (how does she not get tired of it?), these kids start getting rowdier and rowdier, then the screaming and cursing starts and the tossing around of trash. I look around at the other adults with their small children and they all cringe and ignore it. Now normally I am fairly averse to direct confrontation (I usually second guess whether or not it’s important enough for me to say something or if I’m being unreasonable) but there are certain situations where I just lose it, and this was one. I barked at the kids to watch their language, pick up their trash and how about not acting like complete fools while they're at it. Remember, this playground is full of four and five-year olds listening and watching this group. As you can imagine, although at first stunned by the fact someone actually reprimanded them (not sure any adult had ever done that), they gave me some attitude, moved away a bit, and more quietly at least, continued their posturing.
Just so we are absolutely clear, when I say cursing, I mean screaming to each other across the playground about how many times so-and-so f*&ked so-and-so and how much f*&^ing they were doing, etc. Sadly, I am not exaggerating. And, mind you, these were kids no older than 14-15 - not a one even old enough to drive.
So, while I’m deeply saddened these young people thought it was "cool" to publicly cheapen themselves (we should all take a step back for a minute and think about what that truly means for our young people), I’m even more disillusioned by the parents and adults around me that chose to look the other way. Instead of backing me up, other adults just shrugged, avoided eye contact (seriously, now we are intimated by pre-teens and teenagers?) and one stated “I guess we can’t shield our kids forever.” WHAT?! While that may very well be a true statement, you have to agree that four and five-year olds should not have to witness that type of behavior, on a playground, without any kind of adult response whatsoever. That is not a lot to ask, right?
Now don’t get me wrong, I get teenagers live to test and push boundaries. I was one myself. They are exploring who they are, trying to get recognition (often in a negative way) and can be callous without realizing it or understanding why. We’ve all behaved poorly at some time or another. But, I bet if we are honest, we also understood it was poor behavior. This experience was different. And I am NOT saying this is a representation of all kids, but in this instance there was no recognition that their behavior was disrespectful and destructive. This was a demonstration of entitlement without consequence, something I fear is becoming more common than we care to admit - and that, my co-adults, is our own fault.
People who respect themselves will respect others. It's a very simple concept. So, perhaps we can all try to be the example so many kids need, whether they know it or not. I know I will because I never want any of my nieces, nephews, grandkids, or any other young person I know for that matter, to be the kid screaming across the playground about how many people they have f&*ked.